ENM-Affirming Therapy

Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM) is an umbrella term for several different kinds of non-monogamous relationships. Different dynamics include: polyamory, “monogamish”, swinging, relationship anarchy, kink - the list goes on…

You and your partner may feel ready to explore ENM, and wonder what that means to your partner, or even to yourself. That might mean that you’re both curious about how to navigate ethically, and need some emotional guardrails. Maybe you are already starting to practice ENM, or have been practicing it for awhile now. In any case, normal feelings of jealousy, confusion, and fear crop up from time to time. I can help you move through it with insight, guidance, and understanding.

The process of opening well involves compassion, curiosity, and conversations - many, many conversations over time with your partner - ideally before going on a first date with someone else or inviting a new partner into bed with you. Moving back to a space of trust and respect is a lot harder after you’ve moved your relationship’s goal posts without intention, accountability, and respectful negotiation.

Sometimes I hear from couples who open their partnership with great enthusiasm and a thirst for adventure - don’t get me wrong, it is exciting! But while they might know how they want to feel, they sometimes have no idea how to talk about it. So, one or both dive without looking, figuratively “kicking down tables and knocking down chairs” within their partnership (shout out to the Pet Shop Boys). This approach can lead to distrust, guilt, fear and resentment.

The good news: you don’t have to just dive in without looking. You can do this with intention and love.

It’s helpful to know how to talk about what you want, consider boundaries, and meet each other with curiosity. In our sessions together, I will help you navigate the many complex emotions which often come up in the ENM dynamic, both wonderful and difficult, in order to create the partnership style which works the best for you. Learning about healthy boundaries, how to validate your partner’s experience, communication strategies, relationship agreements, and managing/normalizing jealousy are all part of this journey…

I’m here to help you re-create your own unique relationship agreement - one that honors your journey, love and partnership style.